Just a little chitter chatter

Hi folks,

It's just me again. Comin' at'cha from Central Indiana where we have some really intense storms moving in fast.

I sit here and I hear the distant rumble of thunder. Haven't seen any lightening yet, but I am sure it's on it's way. The radar is promising a hellofa storm!

Yeah, sure, it makes my neck, back and legs hurt like the dickens, but it has been so humid here the last few days that we need the rain. I hope it will take the humidity down a notch or two but I am not going to hold my breath for that to happen. I've lived in this state for far too long to count on the weather doing anything you expect it to. -- Don't like the weather here in Indiana? Wait a few minutes, it'll change.

My husband, Darrin, is very ill. Something is wrong somewhere but the doctors have yet to figure out what it is.

He has suffered constant head pain for the last two years. Not headaches, mind you, just constant head pain that can't be relieved no matter what we try.

He's seen three different neurologists now, the family doctor we had before I fired him several times and now he has a sleep study going on tonight and has to see an Infectious Disease doctor on the 29th. Only after her (the infectious disease dr) report goes to the pain clinic will they treat him for the pain. The neurologist we consider to be our family neuro told us he expects the pain clinic to administer pain shots in Darrin's neck since all but two or three are bulging and degenerating.

Darrin had clear speech not even a month ago and now he stutters quite bad. It gets worse the more tired he is. He also has all over body weakness that gets worse the longer he stays up. So he stays in bed all the time except for maybe 6 hours of the morning. He really can't handle more then that.

So, okay, what has all this got to do with Bipolar Disorder?

It has to do with the fact that I have BP along with SEVERAL other diagnoses in the mental arena, but that I am STABLE FINALLY! I pray every day to allow the stability to last. I don't have the time to go back down. I just can't afford to. My family need me too much.

I have been taking my meds religiously.

Day before yesterday I made a horrible mistake though. I was hurting so bad that I was to the point of not being able to stand up and walk. So I took 100mg of Flexeril. OMG, don't EVER do that y'all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean I have a HUGE tolerance to meds. Always have had. I can take four to five of my Loracet 10's and a few Somas to boot and it barely takes the edge off the pain. I seriously didn't think taking that much Flexeril would do that to me. I've taken 50mgs before and it didn't even phase me so me, in my own stupidity, figured 100 MIGHT work.

I started hallucinating pretty bad. Things were moving around on me that I knew, in my right mind, were not actually moving. I got very, very nauseated, I couldn't walk a straight line or anything so I went to bed and tried to sleep it off. Thing is, I had been taking pain meds all day long too. REALLY, REALLY BAD COMBINATION that I took on.

I slept and slept. Then yesterday I was too sick to even get out of the bed. I really let everyone down here yesterday. *sigh*

The heat made me pukey whenever I went into the bathroom as our bedroom is the only room that has A/C until the first of July when I will be getting and installing a 12,000 btu in the living room.

I feel better today. I got up at 6AM, went to the grocery here in town, picked up cigarettes, etc. and came back home.

I have one horrendous headache and my back is screaming right now. I'm going to take some pain pills and watch the storm roll in.

Stormy